say hello to the elephant

Hi everyone,

I found an elephant in my “living” room. His name is “I wish I looked better”.  He is a “He” simply because I can’t possible take full responsibility for being so harsh on myself, and maybe I’ll be more forgiving of a male elephant, because men really don’t mean to be so mean. Hahahaha!  Just kidding, for some reason, this one is a “He”.

It has been quite a “body conscious” time for me lately.  First of all, it has been Body Building Competition Season, and I have had a couple of my clients compete. Watching their bodies transform, watching them practice their posing, and showing off their ‘shrinking’ bodies, going to shows to see all the amazing, elite, bodies walking around has been quite humbling and confronting.

When you are helping others mould their physiques, you can’t help but analyse your own.

I am also going to be a bride, to the man of my dreams, in less than 3 weeks!  My dress is not very ‘forgiving’, and I really want to look amazing for him in it. I also want to be able to look back on photos and not think….ewww..  I wish that fold of fat was gone! (It’s a ‘bride thing’ right…?)

Not only has it been Competition Season, and a pending Wedding, but we are also honeymooning on a beach in Cancun Mexico!  Yep, bikini’s. ……Everywhere.

So, with all this going on, I thought I should “tighten” up my diet and training a little, no biggy, just “pull it back”. Yeah….easier said than done!  The more I tried to be good, the more I went bad!!  It’s like wanting what you can’t have! I can normally go without chocolate, but as soon as I said to myself “no more chocolate”, chocolate is all I wanted!!!   agghhhh!!!!

WT?! I should know how to do this!!!! I’ve competed 9 times now, so I know I can diet. I know I can get up early and train. I know I can tighten up my body. So…. Why am I not?!?  Why do I even want to?!?  Or even need to?!? The more I tried the less it happened. I have lost a total of 2kg in 6 months. So, I am pretty much exactly the same, just more stressed than I was!

Then I started to think… Is my body really that bad?

I am healthy and disease free. I am able bodied. I have great eyesight and hearing. I have no allergies. I take no medication. I am able to keep up with kids. I can lift my own body weight.  On paper… I should be so thrilled that I have this amazing human body to house my spiritual soul.

Why is it then that I am so critical of it? Why am I checking my weight every day? Why am I counting my calories every day? Why am I pushing myself to train every day?  Why do I not accept compliments from Matt?  Why am I looking at it, and finding bits I don’t like?

I know that I am not alone in this plight. I know that there are other women out there that do the same.  And it is such a shame.  We are given functioning bodies and we are still not happy.

This is a big issue. This is an elephant, and he is definitely in my room.

I could blame society. I could blame myself. I could blame 100 different things.

But blame doesn’t shift the burden. I don’t really care what caused it, because that won’t make it go away!  I’m going to find ways to deal with it. Give myself some tools, to put that elephant outside in the yard- & get it out of my living room!

Ok, so how am I going to do this..??!!

Well first of all, I am going to take the pressure of myself and be grateful for all the good things my body does and has.

So, this week, I have started to add 1 good point to every 1 negative I find on my body. I know that years of criticising myself is not going to stop, so I’ve included the criticism in my plan.

For example, when I see my “slouchy” belly and think “YUK How disgusting”, I then say “well, that’s one bad thing, but I am grateful that I have legs that can take me anywhere I want, so that’s one good thing.”  Then I smile, and walk away from the mirror! Hehehe! (thanks legs!)

I’ve only been doing this for 6 days, and, to be honest, it is helping. I’m not sure if I have lost weight or not, but I have had compliments that I am looking good…!  Maybe I was getting those compliments before, but the elephant was standing in the way and it stopped me from hearing them!  Maybe, now that I am saying nice things to my body, it is happy to oblige me with results from my dieting and training. Who knows, who cares? The compliments are nice, and the training and dieting seems easier.

And… you know what else I have noticed…?? That the same few “body negatives” come up, but SOOOO many more “body positives” that I had forgotten about!  It is making me realise that the bits of my body that I don’t like, are such a small percentage, compared to all the bits about myself that I DO like!

Here’s one for you right now:

I’m not a fan of my stretchmarks and loose skin on my tummy, but I love that my eyes sparkle when I smile!

And girls… while I have you…. Here is something to ponder regarding your body.

After years of Personal Training, I can quite confidently say, that everybody’s body, has ONE “bit”. One “bit” that stores fat easier. “One” bit that really annoys you. “One” bit that just won’t go away.

But here’s the thing- it’s normal for us to compare our bit someone else’s.  For example, my bit is my stomach, so the first thing I notice on other girls, is their stomachs.

Usually it is gorgeous, and I get really jealous. However, unbeknownst to me, that girl hates her “bum” (that’s her “bit”), and she checks out my bum, and get jealous of mine!

So, remember, no one is perfect, and we all have “one bit”, yet there is someone else out there right now, who wants one of your GREAT bits.  So, you may as well enjoy your great bits that others wish they had, instead of dwelling too much on that “One” bit you don’t like.  Why not! Why waste what you got- girlfriend?!

Ohh, yeahhhh…….look out Mr Elephant, you’re going to be out of my living room and in that backyard real soon!

I hope you too, can find so many more positives about your body, be nicer to it, and reap the benefits that come with doing that!

Bye for now!

Cherlisa xxx